…That I had no control over…
So last week we had a family gathering (fam gathering, we’re hip), and for the first time I was the single one. Both my sisters now have ridiculously nice boyfriends, one won sportsman of the year at his university, the other is a French-Italian 6 foot guitar player… at least vodka doesn’t expect Christmas presents. Anyway the coven conspired to make me dating profiles on plenty of fish and match.com and I have allowed them one full week of control JUST to see how this pans out.
I have two reasons for allowing this potential public shaming (I listened to them making it, and I was tense to say the least). Firstly, watching someone make judgement calls on what they think you like shows alot more about what they think of YOU. From my previous experiences letting my friends play with my tinder, they clearly think I’m horribly racist (I’m not I promise, you’ll find out as we travel though this purgatory together.)
The second reason is that for the most part, I have absolutely hideous taste in men… Not including the ex-boyfriends (but trust me, there were some issues there too), I seem to be attracted to weird, emotional recluses who can’t socialise very well, I have Tim Burton goggles you might say.
The hope is with the combined powers of a judgey (thats a word) family and internet personality tests (which I let them fill in :S) I will find someone who is actually compatible with me that I would usually ignore. Anyway this is just a short post to fill you guys in, I have a champagne flute filled with cheap prosecco and an open mind, lets see what my family thinks of me.
So check in tomorrow after I’ve drunkly accepted this weird form of family based torture and I’ll show you how we catfished potential future dates.
Cigarettes: A native Indian came over asking why we kept signalling SOS (even my smoking seems to be a cry for help)
Dates: Future dates to come! I’m still recovering from noodle dick
Exercise: Pizza with mayonnaise on is an exercise for my stomache